NASVETI, O KATERIH SE NE GOVORI NAGLAS, A DELUJEJO

NAVODILA ZA ŽENSKE IN MOŠKIM V VEDNOST

Ženskam, ki so danes serijsko monogamne ali poročene, a kljub temu osamljene, nezadovoljne in nezadovoljene
Vse prevečkrat slišim, da se jih moški izogibajo, bežijo, ne želijo z njimi živeti, se poročiti ali pa so poročene z emocionalno, seksualno ali mentalno odsotnimi moškimi. Na drugi strani pa so ženske, ki imajo zadovoljujoče partnerstvo vendar, ne čutijo nobene potrebe po intimi ter so fizično ali psihično izčrpane. Poznam rešitev!
Preizkušena modrost je danes šok za ušesa.
Ženske se moramo zavedati, da je naša vloga v odnosu bolj pasivna, nežna, mehka in predstavlja vodo. Moški ogenj, agresijo in grobost se vedno dobro umiri s potrpežljivostjo, postavitvijo moškega na prvo mesto in z idejo, da je bolje biti srečen kot imeti prav. Ženske, pazimo torej na svoj temperament in in se včasih raje ugriznimo za jezik (saj veste kdaj). Moškemu skuhajmo najljubšo hrano in se z njim ljubimo. Tako so delale že naše stare mame in ta modrost je še vedno učinkovita. Če niste že preveč pod vplivom feminizma in potrošniške logike, boste z vajo opazile, da vam moški veliko vrača. In to z veseljem in velikodušno.

Nasvet za ženske, ki se jih njihov moški izogiba
Nasvet za ženske, ki se jih njihov moški izogiba se vedno vrti okoli seksualnosti. Kar pomeni da gre za igro moči. Navadno je v teh primerih ženska aseksualna in za moškega neprivlačna. Popolnoma se mu je podredila, videti je, tako kot on želi, in dela vse, da bi mu ugajala. Najpomembnejša dolžnost ženske pri negi partnerstva je ohranjanje seksualnega ognja. Torej mora ženska ostati vroča in seksualno aktivna. To pa lahko stori edino tako, da zna prebuditi željo, čutnost in senzualnost ženske seksualne energije. Pomembno je, da ženska pokaže svojo seksualno moč in da je privlačna tudi za ostale moške. Ženska mora postati moškemu izziv in ne prelahko dosegljiva. Ko moški postane zainteresiran, ga je treba pripraviti do tega, da z vami počenja nemogoče stvari: namesto ogleda nogometne tekme, vas spremlja na koncert simfoničnega orkestra, opravi vsa hišna popravila in se je pripravljen z vami poročiti.

Nasvet za ženske, ki so poročene z emocionalno odsotnim moškim
Tako kot je ženska simptom moškega je tudi moški simptom ženske. Če je emocionalno odsoten njen moški, je emocionalno odsotna tudi sama. Takšna ženska naj obudi svojo seksualnost, čutnost in moč. Njen moški bo kar naenkrat oživel.

Nasvet za samske ženske
Ko si ženske močno želijo partnerstva, postanejo infantilne. Moške obravnavajo kot otroke in se tako do njih tudi vedejo. Skladno s tem tudi zelo malo pričakujejo od njih. Vedno jim priskočijo na pomoč, jih podpirajo in gladijo njihov ego.
Najprej se morajo ženske zavedati, da si želijo partnerja, in se prenehajo obnašati do moških kot do otrok. Drugič se morajo ženske nehati obnašati do moških, kot da so bolniki in da potrebujejo terapijo. Tretjič; najti morate moškega, ki vas lahko podredi, zato da boste lahko tudi vi ljubljene. Vaš potencialni partner mora imeti vsaj eno lastnost, ki jo vsakodnevno razvija in kjer ga vi ne presegate. Biti mora discipliniran in seveda mora biti tudi funkcionalno odrastel. To pomeni, da je pretrgal infantilne vezi z mamo, ki predstavljajo polje ugodja. Tak moški je sposoben delati, kar je prav za vas, in ne le tisto, kar je prijetno zanj. Mora imeti jasno življenjsko vizijo in jasen partnerski projekt, kjer se lahko vidite tudi same.
Pomembno vezivno tkivo partnerstva je seveda seksualnost. Za žensko je normalno, da izgubi željo po seksualnosti in se jo mora zato naučiti negovati. Če ste seksualno hladni, sramežljivi in je vaš libido ugasnjen vam predlagam, da aktivirate svojo seksualno energijo. Naj vzbrsti. Na voljo je veliko delavnic, ki prebujajo ženstvenost, močno pa vam priporočam tudi uporabo joni jajčka. Predlagam le, da se je ne učite preko spleta, ampak poiščete učiteljico. Naslednja faza je, da ugotovite ali je vaš moški dober ljubimec. To pomeni, da se ukvarja z vami toliko časa, da ste vi popolnoma zadovoljene, on pa je še vedno na vrhuncu svojih moči. Infantilen moški ni sposoben dobrega seksualnega odnosa, toda le seksualno zadovoljena ženska je v partnerstvu  lahko globoko sproščena in radostna.

Nasvet za fizično in psihično izčrpane ženske
Izpraznjen partnerski odnos je posledica napačno vodenega odnosa. Tak odnos je podrejen ekonomiji, kjer partnerja upoštevata le materialne cilje. Komunikacija poteka le na nivoju logistike. Partnerstvo vodi neoliberalna logika, ki globalno izčrpava naravne vire, onesnažuje okolje, povzroča izumrtje bitij, vodi v izkoriščanje in prinaša izključno le denar. Podobno se zgodi tudi v partnerstvu. V takem primeru morata oba partnerja nakopičene materialne dobrine zamenjati za revitalizacijo sebe in svojega odnosa. Ločitev v takih primerih ne pomaga, ker je to podobo, kot če izstopiš iz propadajočega podjetja, brez da bi popravil nastalo škodo.
Izpraznjen partnerski odnos je posledica izčrpanosti ženske in moškega. Oba sta manifestirala svoje ideje, nista pa obudila novih. Ljudje se najprej idejno izčrpamo, šele potem nastopi fizična in psihična izčrpanost. To je zelo pogost pojav, ki kaže tudi na veliko popularnost rekreativnih drog in farmacevtskih poživil. Kratek razmislek pa nam hitro razjasni, da z alkoholom ali drogami vzpodbujeno navdušenje in evforično zaljubljenostjo dolgoročno ne zapolnimo svoje praznine in osmislimo življenja.


članek Karma Plus, 1.5.2017, letnik 15, št. 5
Mirjam M. Korez, univ, dipl, biol., 
projekt »Biti Ženska«, Živa Center, Tomačevo 27, 1000 Ljubljana

 

TIPS THAT AREN’T TALKED ABOUT ALOUD, BUT THEY WORK

Instructions for women – and for men to understand

For women who are serially monogamous or married but still feel lonely, dissatisfied, and unfulfilled
Too often, I hear that men avoid them, flee from them, don’t want to live with them or marry them, or they’re already married to emotionally, sexually, or mentally absent men. On the other hand, there are women in seemingly satisfying partnerships who feel no need for intimacy and are physically or mentally exhausted. I know the solution!

Tested wisdom sounds shocking today
Women must realize that our role in a relationship is more passive, receiving, gentle, soft – we represent water. Male fire, aggression, and roughness are best calmed with patience, putting the man first, with the idea that it’s better to be happy than to be right. Ladies let's watch our tempers and sometimes bite our tongues (you know when). Cook his favourite meal and make love to him. That’s what our grandmothers did, and that wisdom still works. If you’re not too influenced by feminism or consumerist logic, you’ll notice that men start giving back – gladly and generously.

Advice for women whose man avoids them
This always revolves around sexuality – it’s a power game. In these cases, the woman is usually asexual and unattractive to the man. She’s fully submitted to him, looks how he wants her to look, and does everything to please him. The most important duty a woman has in maintaining a relationship is keeping the sexual spark alive. A woman must stay “hot” and sexually active. This means she must awaken desire, sensuality, and the energy of feminine sexuality. It’s important that she expresses her sexual power and remains attractive to other men too. She must become a challenge, not easily available. Once a man is interested, he can be motivated to do things he normally wouldn’t: instead of watching a football game, he’ll take you to a symphony concert, do all the home repairs, and even be ready to marry you.

Advice for women married to emotionally absent men
Just as a woman can be a symptom of a man, a man can be a symptom of a woman. If your man is emotionally absent, you are emotionally absent too. Such a woman should rekindle her sensuality, sexuality, and power. Her man will suddenly come to life.

Advice for single women
When women desperately want a relationship, they become infantile. They treat men like children – and act accordingly. They expect little, always help, support, and stroke their egos.
First, women must realize they want a partner and stop treating men like children. Second, stop treating men like patients who need therapy. Third, find a man who can dominate you, so that you can feel truly loved. Your potential partner should have at least one area he is constantly improving in – and where you don’t surpass him. He must be disciplined and, of course, functionally adult. That means he’s cut the cord with his mother and left the comfort zone. Such a man can do what is right for you, not just what’s pleasant for him. He should have a clear life vision and a defined relationship project – one where you can see yourself too.

Sexuality is a crucial binding tissue in a relationship.
It’s normal for women to lose sexual desire – and that’s why it must be nurtured. If you feel sexually cold, shy, or your libido is gone, I suggest activating your sexual energy. Let it blossom. There are many workshops that awaken femininity, and I also strongly recommend using a yoni egg – but not self-taught online. Find a teacher.
The next step is to determine whether your man is a good lover. That means he engages with you long enough for you to be completely satisfied – while he remains at his sexual peak. An immature man is incapable of good sex, but only a sexually satisfied woman can be truly relaxed and joyful in a relationship.

Advice for physically and mentally exhausted women
An empty relationship is the result of a poorly managed one – one that is dictated by economic logic, where only material goals matter. Communication happens only on a logistical level. The partnership is driven by neoliberal logic – the same logic that exhausts natural resources, pollutes the environment, drives species to extinction, and focuses only on profit. The same thing happens in relationships.
In such cases, both partners need to exchange their material gains for the revitalization of themselves and their relationship. Divorce won’t help – it’s like leaving a failing company without fixing the damage.

An empty relationship results from emotional and mental exhaustion in both partners. They’ve expressed all their ideas but failed to create new ones. First, we run out of ideas – then comes physical and mental exhaustion. This is common and is one reason recreational drugs and pharmaceutical stimulants are so popular. But a moment’s reflection shows us that enthusiasm sparked by alcohol or drugs – or euphoric infatuation – won’t fill our emptiness or give life meaning in the long run.
 

Article from Karma Plus, May 1, 2017, Volume 15, Issue 5
Mirjam M. Korez, BSc in Biology
Project "Being a Woman", Živa Center, Tomačevo 27, 1000 Ljubljana